This is a copy of a letter sent to employees of a small, but moderately successful, Sydney company earlier this year. This is indicative of the damage the Australian Government is doing to small and medium businesses in Australia. Having run my own small business at one stage, I can see where the guy is coming from.
This is not only the situation in Australia, of course, but also in the US, UK and many other supposedly “developed” countries.
This Ad Was Placed in the Personal column of a newspaper in Georgia.
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 05-27-09, 1:43 AM EST.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on my girlfriend, threatening our lives and me.
You also asked for my girlfriend’s purse and earrings.
I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I’d like to apologize for your embarrassment when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.
My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 A CP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.
Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head wasn’t it?
I know it probably wasn’t fun walking back to wherever you’d come from bare footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again.
After I called your mother, or “Momma” as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you’d done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as four other people’s in the gas station on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Long’s Drugstore, along with all the cash in your wallet. That made his day!
I then threw your wallet into the big pink “pimp mobile” that was parked at the curb … after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver’s side of the car.
Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. AT&T just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what’s going on with that?
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA’s office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat – I guess
while he traced your number etc.
In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you … but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider the career path you’ve chosen to pursue in life.
Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.
Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours,
Alex
Recently, large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that parliament is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration. Certain people are angry that Australia might actually want to protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country and, once here, make it harder (as an illegal immigrant) to stay indefinitely. Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests.
Let’s say I break into your house. Then, when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say,
”ve made all the beds and washed the dishes and done the laundry and swept the floors. I’ve done all the things you don’t like to do. I’m hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).
According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must add me to your family’s insurance plan, educate my kids and provide other benefits to me and to my family (my wife will do your yard work) because she too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking-in part.
If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my illegal right to be there. It’s only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I’m just trying to better myself. I’m hard-working and honest, um, except for well, you know.
And what a deal it is for me!! I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an anti-housebreaker. Oh yeah, and I want you to learn my language so you can communicate with me! English is too hard for me to learn. You should also allow me to vote – in my own language, since I live in your house!
Why can’t people see how ridiculous this is?
Only in Australia.